Slow-Mo Sneezing

Stop the spread of Swine Flu in Kansas! Cover your mouths! Wash your hands! (money shot at 57 seconds)

BILL MOYERS INTERVIEWS THE CREATOR OF THE WIRE (DAVID SIMON)

Without a doubt, The Wire is my favorite show and arguably the greatest TV series ever. Here is an excellent interview with writer/producer/creator David Simon. For a better quality video: Part I, Part II.

BREAKIN' WITH MR. ROGERS

THURSDAY PEOM

Hysteria
by T.S. Elliot

As she laughed I was aware of becoming involved in her
laughter and being part of it, until her teeth were
only accidental stars with a talent for squad-drill. I
was drawn in by short gasps, inhaled at each momentary
recovery, lost finally in the dark caverns of her
throat, bruised by the ripple of unseen muscles. An
elderly waiter with trembling hands was hurriedly
spreading a pink and white checked cloth over the rusty
green iron table, saying: "If the lady and gentleman
wish to take their tea in the garden, if the lady and
gentleman wish to take their tea in the garden ..." I
decided that if the shaking of her breasts could be
stopped, some of the fragments of the afternoon might
be collected, and I concentrated my attention with
careful subtlety to this end.

WENDY and LUCY

Wendy and Lucy opens this Friday, April 17th at Liberty Hall
(click here for a solid review)
(click here for movie times)

Billy Gay aka Choo-Choo aka Kenard: Video Picks

Kicking and Screaming (1995): Post-graduation and these kids got nothing to do, and they talk about it a lot. I'm a big fan of Noah Baumbach's work and he pulls a trifecta with this one: writing, directing, and acting. Not necessarily my favorite of his films, but it is an incredible first feature.








POINT BLANK (1967): TAGLINE-"There are two kinds of people in his up-tight world: his victims and his women. And sometimes you can't tell them apart." --> I love me some Lee Marvin










Werner Herzog Eats His Shoe: A short documentary film directed by Les Blank in 1980 which depicts director Herzog living up to his promise that he would eat his shoe if Errol Morris ever completed the film Gates of Heaven.









STAR TREK II: THE WRATH OF KHAN: Arguably the best Star Trek film. R.I.P. Ricardo Montalban. "This is Ceti-Alpha V!!!"












TO LIVE AND DIE IN L.A. (1985): The film is filled with over the top performances from William L. Petersen, Willem Dafoe, John Turturro, John Pankow, among others. Wang Chung composed and performed the original music soundtrack. It does a fine job capturing the uber-testosterone filled and narcissistic ideals of the Reagan era. So much fun.






CACHE (2005): One of Michael Haneke's greatest works. Tells us how a successful and happy life can be torn apart by the simple fact that someone is watching. An incredibly quiet film that Haneke pieces together perfectly.









DEATH RIDES A HORSE (1967): A fantastic Spaghetti Western that is very hard to get on DVD (our DVD copy is obviously transferred from a VHS tape). Lee Van Cleef is one of my favorites, and he is a super bad ass.











TIM & ERIC'S AWESOME SHOW, GREAT JOB!: From the creators of TOM GOES TO THE MAYOR. This is by far my favorite show to put on when I want to drive someone out of the video store--it is obnoxious in just the right way.





STREETWISE (1986): Nominated for an academy award in 1986 for Best Documentary (it lost to THE LIFE AND TIMES OF HARVEY MILK), it shows the lives of several street kids from Seattle. This film has yet to be released on DVD (we hold only a VHS copy) these runaways are well worth the trouble of setting up your old tape player. This film will forever be on my staff picks (it also has a great soundtrack by Tom Waits). Check out photographer Mary Ellen Mark's book STREETWISE for some beautiful shots of these kids, as they grow up in extreme poverty.

Broadzilla's staff pix. Don't make me go Broadzilla on you.

1. Unforgiven: Clint Eastwood directs and stars in this modern western classic. Summary:Retired Old West gunslinger William Munny reluctantly takes on one last job, with the help of his old partner and a young man. Why I like it: Honestly I'm not a huge fan of westerns, but this one just tickles my fancy. I find that the plot is richer in this movie than in others, though it has the western feel.

2. Good-bye Lenin: It's German!!! Summary:In 1990, to protect his fragile mother from a fatal shock after a long coma; a young man must keep her from learning that her beloved nation of East Germany as she knew it has disappeared. Why I like it: It's silly with a serious undertone.

3. Turner and Hooch: Tom Hanks teams up with this adorable pooch. Summary:A detective must adopt the dog of a dead man to help him find the murderer. Why I like it: Once again, this is a silly movie, with dogs, and I like dogs. Though, I don't watch the ending.
4. King of Kong: a Fistful of Quarters:This video-game documentary rocks! Summary:In the early 1980s, legendary Billy Mitchell set a Donkey Kong record that stood for almost 25 years. This documentary follows the assault on the record by Steve Wiebe, an earnest teacher from Washington who took up the game while unemployed. Why I like it: This movie has a surprisingly good depiction of good and evil. You find yourself really rooting for something. Also these people are ridiculous!

Billy Gay's Top 5 Summer Blockbusters!!!

1. Independence Day
"All right, you alien assholes! In the words of my generation: Up Yours!" (Randy Quaid as Russel Casse)

2. Jurassic Park
"Hold on to your butts. " (Samuel L. Jackson as Ray Arnold)

3. Twister
"Why can't we spend a normal day together?" (Bill Paxton as Bill)

4. The Rock
“Your *best*? Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen.” (Sean Connery as John Patrick Mason)

5. Con Air
"Put... the bunny... back... in the box. " (Nicolas Cage as Cameron Poe)

honorable mention: Speed


UPDATE: These are not my "best reviewed" summer blockbusters, but those I saw in the mega-plex and obsessed over as a kid.

Thursday Poem

Lines For The Fortune Cookies
By Frank O’Hara

I think you’re wonderful and so does everyone else.

Just as Jackie Kennedy has a baby boy, so will you–even bigger.

You will meet a tall beautiful blonde stranger, and you will not say hello.

You will take a long trip and you will be very happy, though alone.

You will marry the first person who tells you your eyes are like scrambled eggs.

In the beginning there was YOU–there will always be YOU, I guess.

You will write a great play and it will run for three performances.

Please phone The Village Voice immediately: they want to interview you.

Roger L. Stevens and Kermit Bloomgarden have their eyes on you.

Relax a little; one of your most celebrated nervous tics will be your undoing.

Your first volume of poetry will be published as soon as you finish it.

You may be a hit uptown, but downtown you’re legendary!

Your walk has a musical quality which will bring you fame and fortune.

You will eat cake.

Who do you think you are, anyway? Jo Van Fleet?

You think your life is like Pirandello, but it’s really like O’Neill.

A few dance lessons with James Waring and who knows? Maybe something will happen.

That’s not a run in your stocking, it’s a hand on your leg.

I realize you’ve lived in France, but that doesn’t mean you know EVERYTHING!

You should wear white more often–it becomes you.

The next person to speak to you will have a very intriguing proposal to make.

A lot of people in this room wish they were you.

Have you been to Mike Goldberg’s show? Al Leslie’s? Lee Krasner’s?

At times, your disinterestedness may seem insincere, to strangers.

Now that the election’s over, what are you going to do with yourself?

You are a prisoner in a croissant factory and you love it.

You eat meat. Why do you eat meat?

Beyond the horizon there is a vale of gloom.

You too could be Premier of France, if only … if only…

Nestadious's Staff Picks

Dark Days
A very moving and entertaining film about hum-bums living in a abandoned subway system, it's a great movie about down and out people still getting by and having a decent shelter to live in. Features a kick-ass soundtrack by DJ shadow.
Also recommended is the documentary on how they made the film, found in the special features.

From Beyond
A movie based on an H.P. Lovecraft story that actually retains the creepiness of a H.P. Lovecraft story. If you like weird horror movies, awesome special effects pre-CG era, then this little gem is a sure fire hit.

Hiema
A fantastic cinematic experience that explores the beauty of Iceland combined with live Sigur Ros music. Follows the journey of Sigur Ros as they do a free tour across Iceland. Beautiful, moving music to the max.

Red Dawn
The Russians are coming! The Russians are coming! Awesome horribly hilarious movie about Russia/Cuba invading America. Watch as the 8 students calling themselves the Wolverines kick some commie ass! And starring top-notch stars such as Patrick Swayze and Charlie Sheen!

Treasure of the Sierra Madre
What is the one thing more powerful than love? Greed. In this classic movie starring all-time favorite Humphrey Bogart, 3 strangers hear about an untouched gold mine. There they fight off the horrible rebels, each other, and eventually themselves.

Metalocalypse
What happens when you mix one part epic storyline, 2 parts bad ass metal, and 1 part Seinfeld? Hilarity. Just a note: I hated metal music until I saw this show. I still hate metal music, but DETHKLOK RULES!!!!!!!!

National Geographic's Taboo series
Well, the title kind of explains the idea. Taboo is a series that covers such taboo subjects as:
Drugs, Voodoo, Marriage, Witchcraft, Sexuality, and much much more!

The Rockers
What do you get when you cross awesome Reggae music with a pretty standard plot? A pretty cool movie featuring Jamaican landscape with some Ire Vibrations. Featuring music by Burning Spear, Peter Tosh, Abyssinians, Bunny Wailer, Third World, Gregory Isaacs and Jacob Miller and the Inner Circle.

STYLES' Stiff Staff Picks

Buffalo '66
Ever wanted to kill a pro football player? Vincent Gallo does. Before Chloe Sevigny sucked him off in 'Brown Bunny', Gallo made a good movie about revenge and dysfunctional families that would put any Wes Anderson film to shame. Written, scored, and directed by Vincent Gallo.

Marjoe
Once the youngest evangelical preacher ever ordained (at the age of 4), Marjoe dropped out of preaching and discovered hippies, pot, and women. He would never be the same again. Returning to the preaching circuit 20 years later, Marjoe exposes the money grubbing nature of religious hucksterism.

Existenz
No, it's not the all natural male enhancment pill. It's David Cronenberg's mind fuck about a virtual reality game that compounds reality until the player doesn't know what's real. Like the (Matrix + Tron)-(stupid outfits).

Saturday Night and Sunday Morning
Karel Reisz directs Albert Finney in his acting debut. According to film school, there were a lot of angry young men growing up in Britain during the 50's and 60's, and they made movies about them. This is one of the better ones, with Albert drinking his weight in Guiness, working at a factory, being angry (as mentioned), and falling in love. Cheers!

Never Get Busted Again vol. 1 : Traffic Stops
Quote: "Food is a most excellent way to transport marijuana." Former narcotics officer Barry Cooper gives you the low down on how to avoid profiling, detection from K9 units, and other narcs who don't want you to have a good time. Baby, I'm in a rock 'n roll band; ROLL ANOTHER ONE!

Begotten
Cannibals eating Jesus. God disembowling himself with a razor. Fun for the whole family.

also highly recommended:
Let The Right One In
Glengarry GlenRoss
Synechodoche, New York
Tell No One

Staff Picks - Gabbo Recommended!

Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai
It's a Jim Jarmusch directed movie for people who don't normally love Jim Jarmusch.
The Last Seduction
The Devil could take lessons from this woman. It's modern noir from John Dahl.
Police Squad! (in color)
Better than all of the Naked Gun movies combined.
Heaven (1987)
Are you afraid to die? Do you believe in God? Diane Keaton's directorial debut is a compelling documentary.
The American Friend
A movie I love from Wim Wenders, it's a tale of Ripley, of which there are many adaptations.
Off the Map
Campbell Scott is usually an actor. He's also a good director. I love this stupid hippie movie.
Lantana
Ray Lawrence directed Aussie tale.

Thursday Poem

I'm back, two Thursdays in a row! We're actually three hours into Friday, but who cares. This poem was pulled from the January 2009 issue of The Believer magazine. My dog Gus has been a pain the last two nights, whining and barking for hours--sometimes as late as 3 am--and this poem seems apt.

-Billy Gay

He Quickley Told His Life Story
by Michael Earl Craig

A man was out backcountry skiing when he fell
and did something, broke something,
and he couldn't get up.

He lay there in the snow, miles from any road.
His dog was with him and as he lay there, this dog
raced about and snapped at the snow
and hopped over the man once, twice.
The man spoke to the dog but the dog did not recognize him.
Did not, the man sensed, seem to recognize him.

It was cold and getting dark.
The man could not feel his legs.
The dog was there, he barked insanely at a squirrel.
The man called the dog's name, ordered the dog to sit.
The man asked the dog to please come to him.

As darkness fell the man wondered if this was Death.
The dog was gone. The man lay on is back and cursed.
It was night.

Hours passed. The man thought he heard something.
The beam of a flashlight came stabbing at the trees.
It was his wife, she'd come upon him in the snow.
When he saw her he cried out. She knelt beside him
and he quickly recounted for her his life story,

starting with the birthing canal, his first blankets--
then the sun, how it warmed the universe--
jobs he'd loved and hated--his golf clubs--his marriage--
a couple cars he owned.
He blinked his eyes. He was angry.

The man raved but was alone. There was no one.
His limbs went out like candlewicks and he felt a flame
glowing in his chest. The dog ran like mad through the woods,
snapping at the wind.

Amnesty Notes

Hey-hey!
Taxes went up from 7.3% to 7.85% on 1 April, 2009. So, to commiserate, we held a Late-Fee Amnesty Day (and lowered our prices, but we'll talk about that later).
Total Amount in Late-Fees Forgiven: $1,572.43
Biggest Single Late-Fee: $258.20

In the past, we would hold an entire week of late-fee forgiveness, and it would usually take place around this time of year. It got to the point where people kind of expected it, and perhaps took it as their due, and that, comrades, will build resentment within the charcoal heart of a video-store manager. To combat the reflexive stinginess that surrounds a standard citizen (whether spending or earning money, here), we are implementing, as an experiment, a new kind of Amnesty. We, all of us, in possession of little currency but possessed by a great love of karmic renewal, will have, each and every one, our Amnesty, as sure as the date of birth that appears on proper I.D.
That's right.
You May Receive Late-Fee Amnesty on Your Birthday!
Details to follow in the posts ahead. I have to run around like a fool for a while.
-permazorch